THIS WEEK AT IMPACT

HINDI PART II

थिस इस रेअल्ल्य क्रेच्किंग मे उप। सो मान्य पीपुल रेअल्ल्य वांट तो क्नोव वहत ई ऍम व्रितिंग। ई गुएस्स ठाट सोम परसों विल फिगुरे थिस आउट सूनेर ओर लेटर। थें मय फुं विल बे ओवर। बर्ड एस्तेप इस स्टील अ होसेहेअद।


पास,

डी.ए.प.

BLOG IN HINDI

वेल्कोमे तो मय ब्लोग इन हिंदी। जुस्त सो ठाट यू अल क्नोव, तेरे इस अ फेतुरे नोव ओं ब्लॉगर ठाट अल्लोव्स यू तो राइट इन हिंदी। ई हवे नो आईडिया वहत गूढ़ थिस विल दो बुत इत इस रेअल्ल्य कूल। ई होप ठाट सोमोने विल रीड थिस ऎंड ऎंड लेट मे क्नोव ठाट थेय कैन रीड इत। थे ओनली थिंग ठाट ई रेअल्ल्य वांट तो सय इस ठाट बर्ड इस अ होसेहेअद।

पास,

डी.ए.प.

CORN INDIANA

**WARNING-WHAT YOU ARE ABOUT TO READ COULD PUT YOUR LIFE AT RISK**
There is a place in this great country of ours in which the laws of logic do not exist. This place is known to very few "outsiders". In fact, thousands of people drive through there every day not even noticing that something is very...odd. Even now when I think about it, I get this strange feeling that I have witnessed something that I shouldn't have. I feel like I am being watched. I will not tell you exactly where it is because residents there may be reading this and would certainly come after me to keep me "quiet". All I can tell you is that this parallel universe does exist and it is in the area of interstate 65 between Indianapolis and Chicago. I simply refer to it as "Corn", Indiana. You see in Corn, things are different. There seems to exist this "secret society" of people that do things a little bit....different. To call them backwards wouldn't really explain their practices in life there. I will try to explain (although it really is illogical). In Corn, one of the ways they survive is to sell things. They attract tourist using flashy signs depicting cows eating ice cream and huge wheels of cheese. The tourist are lured like moths to a light bulb by promises of a cheese factory tour, home made ice cream and fancy barns to make you feel like you are down on the farm. In fact, this is where the weirdness begins as last week, Brad and I were also lured into the clutches of this magical place of high butter fat ice cream, cows, big cheeses, and of course a working cheese factory.
"You're really not going to stop here are you? We should leave now. You are an idiot". I should have heeded those words (except the idiot part, he is such a hosehead) from Brad. I still hear them in my dreams. We searched for Ice cream (and a bathroom) for what seemed like minutes. We located a huge barn that I was sure would house a bathroom but the only entry door would require us to pay money to go on some kind of indoctrination program to Corn (or it could have been a dairy tour). We walked around the outside of that huge barn trying to find a bathroom and then we saw a promising sign that let to.... the cheese factory. Surely where there is cheese, there is a toilet. I was right. The cheese factory barn was stunning. Huge blocks and wheels of every kind of cheese that you could imagine. It was a beautiful sight. I almost cried. In the back of the cheese store was a huge window where you could watch them make the cheese. As we pressed our faces against the window to watch the cheese making magic, the first of the oddities of Corn Indiana struck us. They do not actually make cheese at the working cheese factory. There before us was a room gleaming in stainless steel and cheese machines that I can't explain but..... and this is a huge but...no people, no cheese. So observation about Corn number one: They do not actually make cheese at the "working cheese factory". The craziness of Corn continues as we entered the line for the "home made" ice cream. There, in front of us, was the counter to purchase ice cream. First oddity of buying ice cream in "Corn": There were no signs to label any ice cream, prices, or anything else about purchasing ice cream. Second oddity of buying ice cream in "Corn": Not one else in the whole place seemed to be buying ice cream (again.... those words of Brad "We should leave now"). By now, my heart was beating very fast. I didn't know what to do next, but I knew that I had to make contact with the Corninian ice cream chick in order to get ice cream, so I asked her a simple question. How do you sell your ice cream here? Her answer still defies what is logical to me. Her answer was that they sell a single and a double. Sounded simple enough to me so I asked how big was a single. She answered, "A SINGLE is TWO scoops and a DOUBLE is FOUR scoops. I know that I must have just stood there dumbfounded by this Corninian math. A "single" is "two" scoops? This secret society obviously has there own math system. I was stunned for a couple of minutes and I'm not sure what happened (I think that I kind of passed out). All of the sudden, Brad and I were walking... no... fast walking, out of the cheese factory (that does not actuallymake cheese)/ice cream place (that sells a single that is two scoops).
I hope that you take the warning at the top of this writing seriously. I think that Brad and I have uncovered the Corninians and their plans to take their beliefs to the rest of the world. I myself, have survived an attack on my life where they tried to poison me with a tainted cheese coney. So let these words burn into your mind. Beware if you you ever take interstate 65 north to Chicago or you too could find yourself right in the middle of.....Corn.

THE UNEXPLAINED

There are some things in life that you just can't explain. I realize that some things don't need to be explained to us and that's okay. But you should know that at any given moment, I am continuously rolling around in this over sized head of mine many of these "things" that are beyond explanation. Some are very deep and spiritual, some are not. But it's always something that really bugs me. This last winter, it was "Why is it that when it rains, thousands of earthworms come out of their comfy earthen homes and commit mass suicide on blacktop and concrete surfaces?" I have since found out the answer (thanks bro) and will share it with you at a later date (and it's not that they are drowning). I find that other people around me are also troubled by this nagging need to explain things. One such person is very upset by the fact that the "Dollar INN" motel chain does not cost a dollar a night but in fact cost many more dollars in exchange for one night of lodging. Why? I say all of this only to let you know that lately I have been perplexed by the following question: "Why do I have an almost irresistible craving for "Pal's" food? It really defies logic. I know that people in this part of the country have no idea what Pal's is so I have included a picture above. The picture says it all. In northeast Tennessee, there are Pal's Sudden Service restaurants everywhere. I think that I have been to most but the question remains; what is it about Pal's that attracts me so? Is it the stylish exterior of the establishment? Is it the "frenchy fries"? Is it the huge sweet iced tea for $0.79 or is it the "Sauce Burger" (taste and you will understand)? The answer is....I don't know. What I do know is that I MUST find out. So in the interest of science and goodwill to all mankind, I can think of only one way to explain this one mystery of many....ROAD TRIP. Yes, in the interest of science, me and my highly trained team of experts are going straight to the source. We're going to Pal's. We will be leaving soon for a no nonsense trip to northeast Tennessee for the sole purpose of eating at Pal's. So that our report will be unbiased, we are not going for any other reason. We will drive there (5hours), eat at Pal's, and return in hopes of answering the unexplained. Again, I do this for the sole purpose of answering the unexplained and the good of all mankind everywhere. Our team will report our findings in a future post.

TOO MANY GIANT PIXIE STICKS....I THINK

I'm not sure what caused it. I usually don't dream too much. It could have been a case of "March Madness" (I'm out of control, just ask Julie) or it could have been that my dinner last night consisted of Coke Zero and giant pixie sticks (one of my youth sponsors gave them to me, they are nearly three feet long). Either case, I had a wild dream last night. In my dream I was seven or eight years old. My whole family was there (Mom, Dad,Brother,Sister,Sister). It was Saturday morning and we were doing what we always did on saturday morning. My mom was making pancakes (I woke up smelling them this morning, wierd), my dad was drinking coffee and reading something, and my siblings and I were fighting over whose day it was to pick what shows to watch (Big family. No cable. We had a schedule). My brother wanted to watch Superfiends, I wanted to watch Buggs Bunny, and I don't really remember what my older sister wanted to watch but I think it was like an after school special or something like that. We ended up watching "The Uncle Al Show" (as pictured above). Some of you will not know what I am talking about but hang in there. I was doing the twist, going down in the cave to see the wizard, and all the other Uncle Al stuff right along with the kids on TV. This dream was so realistic I even remember the Uncle Al prayer song,"I love you God for this my day, I love You in my work and play, I think of You in every way, thank you God for this my day, thank you God for this my day.. Amen". Sounds very warm and fuzzy, right? It was until it got really wierd. Let me explain. On the Uncle Al show, Uncle Al had a dog named Pal. It was basically a dude in a dog suit. So in my dream Uncle Al suddenly get's in a fight with Pal. Al is going crazy and rips the dog's head off. (Sidenote: This is where things get really crazy but this is truly my dream last night) So the fake, big, dog head falls of the dude playing "Pal" and the actor guy turns around and I see the face of the actor as being someone very familiar. It is Brad Estep!! THEN, Brad, Uncle Al, Captain Windy, Lucky the Clown, and all of the kids on the show turn around toward the camera and say/sing, "Hey Dan! You are beautiful my sweet sweet song". In my dream, my whole family starts laughing and telling me how Brad really got me that time. Then...it was over. I woke up in a cold sweat smelling pancakes and wondering to myself about my own sanity. So "march madness" or giant pixie sticks I don't really know. What I DO know is that I will never eat giant pixie sticks, on a spring forward weekend, during march madness ever again. Lesson Learned.

COMING SOON TO IMPACT

Believe 2007

MR. CONFUSED

EVERY MORNING

COMING SOON TO IMPACT AT LCC!!!

LONG TIME....NO BLOG

Wow! Has it really been such a long time since I posted? So...what has been going on with me? Well it seems that Christmas is quickly approaching. I must say, I am am absolutley burnt out on Christmas music. I think that it is primarily because I start hearing Christmas music in the office literally around September (I won't mention the name of who does that). Soon after that, I start caroling group practice followed by the kids starting Christmas choir followed by worship band Christmas music practice followed by five weeks of Christmas music in worship. Basically, I'm done. No more Christmas music. So, on to other subjects. This saturday, i'm heading up to Chicago to pick up hosehead. It will be nice to see him and catch up on what's going on. I'm dubbing this trip the "Brad and Dan's Holiday Home Run". It should be good times. I hope that the greasy hot dog stand is open at 9:00am when I get there. Well enough of this foolishness. I need to get back to work. PURE 2007 is coming up very fast (see www.lovedtolove.org for info and registration) and there is much more to be done.

Merry Christmas,
Dan

You Better Watch Out!

PURE 2007

PURE 2007

PURE 2007

January 12th-13th 2007

Loveland Christian Church

PIANO

I know that God has blessed us all with different talents. Things that we are all obviously gifted at doing. Some people can juggle, some can walk on their hands, some people can write poetry, some people can fart on command (yes, I know someone that can do it and yes it is a talent), some people can memorize entire books in just a few seconds, and still others can...play the piano. That last one is the one that really bothers me. You see, I would consider myself moderately musically talented. I really enjoy music of all kinds. I play a little guitar, I can tell when people are off key, and I can sing the first line of literally hundreds (if not thousands) of songs. Wierd huh? But I would gladly trade any of that talent or any other talent that I have, to be able to play the piano. It has always been a dream of mine to sit down at a piano and just start playing or to go into a music store at the mall and just amaze everyone around at my piano playing ability. The fact of the matter remains, however, that I just am not made to play piano. I guess my first problem is that I can't even read music (not even every good boy does fine). All those...notes are just are too confusing. I do have friends that play the piano and I ask them what the secret is, they simply say, "I have taken piano lessons since I was six". Well guess what, I'm not six and I would hate to spend the next 20 or 30 years taking lessons just to be able to play Mary Had a Little Lamb. So here I am. Waiting for some kind of miracle cure to come along that can make me play the piano (without lessons or practice of course). I only write this because I believe that there is someone out there that can tell me how to play the piano but without all of the work. There has to be some "secret weapon" that very few people know about. I want to play the piano. Someone...please show me the way.

Fall...STINKS

Fall...STINKS! Now don't get me wrong. I'm all for the cool clear weather, trick or treating, footbal games, hay rides, and trips to the apple farm (Rouster's Cider on 132 is the best). Those things are cool to me. But the fact of the matter remains that fall (also known as autumn), is the time of the year from late september to late December in which deciduous plants in the northern hemisphere drop their leaves. You see, I hate raking leaves. It may not seem like a big deal to you but you must understand where I live. I live in a subdivision known as "Paxton Woods" (if someone reading this is stalking me and is happy to now know where I live, that's ok, just bring a rake when you come). They didn't name it "Paxton Woods" for no reason. At last count I have about 32 deciduous trees in my relatively small back yard. What it boils down to is that for the next few weeks my life will revolve around removing those leaves. Again, you might say" just leave them there". If only it were that easy. Leaves left unremoved will clog gutters, destroy my pool cover, kill the grass (that might not be a bad thing), and rot our wooden deck. In other words, cause big problems. While some may look at fall with fondness over warm and fuzzy past fall memories, I think...FALL STINKS!!!

A Morning At The Pole

The morning started early for me today. I got up at 5:50am to start this awesome day. Why so awesome? It's because today was national "See you at the Pole" day. It is the day of the year where students around the United States join together before classes and pray (often around the flag pole) for their school, their friends, and each other. It is truly an awesome sight to see so many students circled up and praying even through the hustle and bustle of the arrival of others and even some rude comments. I started this morning at home praying for all of our students at LCC that would be participating in this student led event. Then, I hit the road. My first stop was Loveland High School and then it was off to Kings. I have tried to be around a couple of schools each year to simply support them in my own prayer while they are in prayer. I must say that it is very emotional time. To see all of these students (without any adult guidance) just....praying. It fills me with a sense of encouragement to whitness this event. It doesn't seem to matter the type of church that they come from or even it they attend a church at all, everyone is welcome to join the group and unite in prayer. But today, I also was filled with a sense of...guilt. You see, being an adult, I am supposed to have it all together, to lead the way spiritually to those who will come after me. Today, I had to ask myself, Would I have the guts to participate in such a public display of my faith at... Meijers, or Home Depot, or even a Reds game? Adults are often very comfortable displaying our faith...on Sundays (if in the right building) but are we living our faith out for all the world to see? This morning, instead of being a person that tries to help lead students to a relationship with Jesus Christ...I was the one being led.

Pictures Mentioned In Previous Blog

Left: Sign that made Brad Mad
Below: Candy Factory
Lower Left: Brad's Great Timing
Lower Left: The Windy City
Bottom Left: Brad's New Home

Chicago

Well I guess I should saya a few words about "Brad and Dan's Excellent Chicago Adventure". I think that you all can imagine what being in a little car with Brad for about seven hours (yes we took the scenic route)was like. Mostly it was one studid comment after another followed by laughter folled by flatulets (I'm not quite sure the spelling is right on that word but I can't say fart's here because I think that my mother reads this) followed by video followed by side trips followed by eating followed by laughter followed by...I think that you get the picture. Brad also likes to take pictures of bill boards although most of the pictures that I have are of the mirror of the car, his seatbelt or his shoes (his timing isn't that great). One bill board actually made him kind of angry. He saw one for "Dollar INN" and the price per night was $26.95. He feels like he has a good court case to sue for misrepresentation in advertising (you know, is it one dollar or 26.95?). We also took a side trip to "The Candy Factory". It was pretty cool. They had a 30 foot tall chocolate waterfall and all kinds of wierd candy like a plastic nose that you wear on your face and candy comes out of the nostrils (I bought one of course)and even a 4 inch jaw breaker (I bought on of them as well). All in all the trip lived up to our high standards. Chicago was...huge! I didn't realize how dinky Cincinnati is. I think that Brad is adjusting well. I will try to keep you all posted on his activities. I have included some pictues from our trip as well as well as one picture of Brad's new "home away from home". Please be sure to keep him in you prayers as well as the people that have to live with him for a year.